I have a confession to make. I was really scared when I took my new job. I had actually been working up to it for a while I had been focusing in my meditation about letting go. You might wonder why I needed to practice letting go in order to embrace this new activity. Let me give you a quick background. I was working in water efficiency and water resource management in both my previous positions meaning I have been doing it for the last 14 years. Not just working in it. I created the entire program for my utility and worked on regional, state and national stage in this field. I was recognized, award-winning and an expert. There is a comfort in that. If you know that you can go and exceed every day then you decide to do something different. It is big deal. It is especially a big deal if you associate so much of yourself with this success. I used to do, still did a little not as much as before I started working on myself.
I had to find a way to let go of who I was and that mastery to open myself to this new period of learning and growth. It has been surprising how energizing it is to be in growth mode again. That is maybe not as surprising for me as how easy it has been to let go of that other me. The master and expert. I have found it empowering to inform all of my committees that I have moved to a new position and I won’t be available to continue these activities. I thought it would be painful. I have not had a job where I just really concentrated on one thing in a long time. I also have not been actively in growth mode for a long time. For a while I was really off kilter being in growth mode. It had been so long. Now I am still in growth mode and will be for a long time. I have found my groove in growth mode. The first step is acknowledging that I am no longer moving and deciding from an expert position, but from a growth position. Accepting that has helped me to find a balance.
What I also have learned is how bored and stagnant I felt. Yes it is true I received a lot of accolades and a lot of opportunities in my old role. I am so grateful. After I took this leap I realized that these accolades and opportunities had not been fulfilling that contribution and value part of me in a few years. Onward toward the new and unfamiliar in search of a renewed purpose.