I know I have been MIA on the blog, but that is actually proof that I am making progress toward being less of a perfectionist. The fact is there have been a lot of things going in my life and I tried to focus on what was really important.
Since I last wrote my husband and I have taken a trip to see our family in California, I have been gone to a conference for work for a week and I came back from 2 weeks across country to start a brand new job as the Division Manager of Customer Service for my utility. Add to that my best friend is undergoing chemo for colon cancer, my cat Pablo had Radioactive Iodine to treat his hyperthyroidism, the regular family obligations with my mom and aunt, and my volunteer work at Good Mews cat shelter. What I believe I have finally grasped is maybe you can do everything, but even if you think you are you are not doing them well and you are paying a price.
I did things differently and even though all of that may sound overwhelming, I have not felt overwhelmed. That has been the most significant example of how much I have changed in the almost two years ago I started this process. I think there have been two big changes I have been able to let go of what is no longer important. For work that meant actually quitting obligations tied to my old job. I did it compassionately but I also did it completely. In the past transition has been so stressful because guilt or fear of losing out or losing status have kept me with one foot in the new changes and one foot in the past. This is a tough and stressful line to straddle. It was so freeing to contact all of my committees and organizations and just simply say I took a promotion and I can no longer do this. You know what? Everyone was fine, they were even happy for me and grateful for all I had done.
The other change was me. In this stressful period I now find that I have a calm and clarity I never had before. I am able to focus on one thing at a time. More important I am able to admit to myself and others that we may want to get this done and we will in the future but everything has a time and a season and this is not the priority right now so it will have to wait. I credit meditation with helping to calm my frenetic mind. I know it has helped me to become a more compassionate and centered person. As I write this I am at day 699 of meditation. I owe a debt of gratitude. Things are settling down so I hope to be back at blogging more regularly. Hope you have a wonderful day. Namaste.